Ahh… That fresh burst of confidence that I get every time I finish that one cup of coffee before I officially start work…
And we all know I’m lying. I’m a great, big lying liar with that statement. We all know coffee does not come with confidence guaranteed. No, it comes with sanity. Okay? There’s a huge difference. Sanity is what keeps you from making idiotic, drunk-like statements and any kind of faux pas. Confidence is what keeps you wearing leggings as jeans, camel toes be damned. See? Huge difference.
I don’t know about you, but I get my confidence from the inside. I am not the “fake it ’til you make it” type of gal. You can’t expect me to put on some nice clothes and step out of the house looking like I am one of God’s favorite creatures in the whole damn universe. I need that spark from within. I need to feel good about myself or the environment I’m in before that good feeling manifests physically. I can’t just transform into a passable-looking human being when I feel like staying in my room for the rest of
my life the year. Some girls can put on make-up and cute clothes and voila! They already feel better! Instant pick-me-upper! Sadly, I am not that type of person. However… flip that process and BOOM! There’s little old me: When I feel good, that’s when I’ll make the effort to look good. Inside out, I’m telling you. Inside out.
And so with that said, I am sorting out things in my life. Think of it as the laundry list of my life. I have been slowly doing this, from something as huge as processing grief over the recent death of my father to something as mundane as lessening my intake of junk food. (Cheetos, I am looking at you. That aisle full of chips near the slurpee machine at 7-Eleven, I am looking at you , too.) Also, news flash: I am weeding out negative people in my life. I mean, really. So yeah. Laundry list. Changes.
I am not sure when these changes will finally be accomplished, as there are major and minor ones. But I do know that I am at a point in my life where I need to actually take charge and not just react mindlessly to the things that really matter. Not to say that I will finish all of those but hey, better an “Oops!” than a “What if?”, right?
Now this is where I leave you to give you some room for your thoughts and musings, in case you feel the need to do the same.