I was meaning to write about this last week, when a random streak of flashbacks occurred during one time I was reading a book and wool-gathering at the same time. But then I forgot all about it because apparently I am getting great at forgetting things I shouldn’t forget. The good news is that I have now remembered those instances that I wanted to write about last week, so hurrah! for that.
As it turns out, all is not lost when it comes to my skill in recalling the funny things that happened.
1. ‘Twas a messy night.
Like most people I know, I almost always rely on Facebook’s birthday reminders. So when a friend’s birthday came up, I greeted him via social media (because who doesn’t do that nowadays, amiright?). This was the brief exchange:
Me: Happy birthday! [insert an assortment of emojis]
Him: Love me.
I was perplexed, until I figured this sequence of logic: birthday, going out, drinking, getting smashed, blackout / blurry recall. He told me he doesn’t remember sending me that message, which confirmed my thoughts on that one. Of course. OF COURSE. To which I then burst out laughing, recalling my own past stunts in a drunken state of mess and happiness. Good times! (Although some of them I would never, ever do again.)
2. She doesn’t just botch song titles.
My mother keeps on calling someone Conrad whose name is actually Douglas. I have corrected her several times. Countless times. Douglas himself corrected her. She would then go and say, “Oh right. Douglas. Sorry.” And then begins calling him Conrad the next time. Puzzled, she told me, “Why do I keep calling him that name? I don’t know any Conrad.” To which I replied, “Yeah, you do. We do. He’s an ex-boyfriend of mine.” She simply said, “Oh, right.” (She still couldn’t get his name straight, though.)
3. I have a confession to make: I actually forgot the third item.
I can always pretend I never forgot it and then made one up on the spot. But honesty’s the best policy, right? And I just can’t leave it at two items, no. The sky will fall off. The balance of the universe will be tilted and upset. The Earth will get unhinged from its axis. There just has to be a third item! And given that it’s a weekend, let me just fill this with a gif, one that denotes fun (heart-shaped sunglasses!) and passion (all that red!), which I hope were in your weekend.