Sunset Senses

Sometimes I wonder if I am alone on this: I don’t find watching sunrise romantic. I’d rather be fast asleep at that time, thank you very much. So it didn’t make sense that I even bothered to climb up Elephant Mountain back in September 2017. It was, as my friend insisted, to get the best view of the sunset. I didn’t care much for it, but I did care about not wanting to rain on his parade. Big mistake. BIG. Oh dear lawd, I was not prepared for that initiation from hell 20-minute hike. Granted, I wasn’t exactly fit but I do a lot of walking so I thought I was all set. Ha! Hahahaha NO. I wasn’t even halfway up there and I thought I was going to pass out, I kid you not. (That was when my heart can take physical activities like that.) I stopped twice or thrice as I went up, up, up the halfway point. I wanted to cry. I wanted to run back down those steps, screaming and crying some more. You know what stopped me? The thought that I was already THERE. Just a few more steps, a couple more and I’ll reach the halfway point. When I do, I give myself full permission to collapse.

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Think About It

This week (or was it last week? I never know. My memory’s getting worse. Someone send help.), I posted in my Instagram story about how some people seem to be more flustered or disturbed by the fact that I am still single at the old, decrepit, helpless, woebegone age of 37. You may now call me D O O M W I T C H from hereon moving forward. (Please see here for awesome reference.)

Now what was this little doomwitch talking about? Oh, right. People getting bothered about my being single. Recently, I was talking to a friend (whom I haven’t conversed with in ages) and she asked how old I was. So I told her my age and when she learned I don’t have a boyfriend, she laughed and said the kind of man I better get was someone who didn’t want children because, you know, I’m 37 and my baby box has long expired and is of no use to any man now.

Look, folks. I’m tired of hearing the same things over and over again. I know I am happy and content being single, but some people have a way of making me feel terrible about my choice. I still feel lucky, though, that I do have friends who understand where I’m coming from. And I am grateful and thankful that I have never — not once — heard anything belittling from them.

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Dispatch 00: Q1 2019

Flight Log: Departure

It’s April and I look around, wondering where did the past three months go. Surely, I didn’t just spend most of those days napping and watching kdramas???? (Ssshh. I truly did but let’s tell no one.)

I’m not very big on giving myself pep talks about being all perky and chirpy for the next quarter of the year. I haven’t even planned beyond what I’ll be doing this weekend. It’s hard to give self pep talks about plans and goals that are non-existent. (Dry sense of humor. Very dry.) So how about a quick recap of this year’s first quarter instead? That way, I can talk about how much time I wasted spent aimlessly placed on awesome, AWESOME kdramas.

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